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Speaking at the book release of ‘Live While You’re Alive’ by Shiv Khera, Jaishankar shared some anecdotes from his life and career as a diplomat and advised people on how to manage stress.
External Affairs Minister S Jaishankar speaking at the book release of Shiv Khera’s ‘Live While You’re Alive’.
Whether you are unhappy with your job, or are working long hours, or you are newly married or have kids – stress is a normal part of your life. Managing stress has become the key priority of our lives, but we often go the wrong way about this. In this regard, External Affairs Minister S Jaishankar had unique advices for people on how to manage stress.
The minister emphasised the need for developing confidence to manage stress, self-motivation and accept the mistakes of your lives and rectify them. “No one is perfect. People normally talk about your success, and you talk about your own success. It would be very interesting if we pause for a moment and thought where you did not do that,” he said, adding that he always remembered the exams he did not clear.
The External Affairs Minister was speaking in Delhi at the book release of author Shiv Khera’s ‘Live While You’re Alive’, which deals with several aspects of stress management and work-life balance. In his keynote address, Jaishankar shared anecdotes from his personal life and his career as a diplomat and politician to advice people on how to manage stress.
Jaishankar’s 3Cs Of Success
“Most people obviously understand that I passed the UPSC, but I sat for the IIT entrance exam and I did not pass. Recently, I was attending an event and someone went through the great trouble of getting my school report. They got a copy of it, had a presentable version of it, and they were under the mistaken impression that it would be a good report,” he said at the event.
Jaishankar stressed that no one should feel dejected after a setback and constantly strive for self-improvement. “When I look at my own particular responsibilities now but even earlier as diplomat, I had to aspire to reach the 3Cs of success. Contact – the more people you know, the greater your reach. Chemistry – If you get along with people, they are more likely to do things for you. Credibility – if you are known to be good on words, people take you seriously,” he said.
The EAM also quipped that avoiding chronic stress and being a minister don’t go too well, drawing some laughs from the audience. “My most honest answer (to manage chronic stress), you normalise the abnormal. You build your life around it, you de-stress it by making it a part of your life. If your phone rings in at 2 in the night, you answer it and go back to sleep and get up at 6 or 7 and try to remember and hope what you said was right.”
‘Invest In Relationships, Get A Good Night’s Sleep’
Jaishankar also shared his six takeaways from Shiv Khera’s new book:
- Plan for the unplanned
- Invest in relationships
- No appeasement
- No toxicity
- Respect time
- Get a good night’s sleep
“I think these takeaways are really very sensible advice offered to people, who may be very stressed or may not be stressed. You won’t certainly be stressed if you follow these things,” he said.
The minister also highlighted the importance of discipline in life, citing the example of young volunteers going to China’s Wuhan at the peak of the COVID-19 pandemic to get back Indians. “Most people started work from home, but the Ministry of External Affairs moved to a three-shift routine. More people came to work everyday. Instead of work from home, for us it was go home occasionally… At that time, I saw what discipline does, what a sense of duty does.”
“If there is personal motivation, organisational motivation, if that is the culture, people will be willing to go the extra mile and more to get things done.”
‘No Risks, No Rewards’
Jaishankar stressed that there were no rewards without risks, which meant that people had to take on some stress. He cited the examples of diplomats personally overseeing the evacuation of Indian nationals from war-torn areas of Ukraine and Sudan. “We could not have got the job done if we had not taken risks,” he said.
Another important aspect, Jaishankar said, was being there for others at the right time, cited the examples of India delivering crucial economic aid to Sri Lanka and Covid-19 vaccines to Caribbean countries. “The average Sri Lankan remembers this, that when their economy was falling off a cliff, we stepped up, most importantly at the right time. Our aid was huge, but more importantly, it came at the right time because the IMF was still negotiating,” he added.
In his concluding remarks, the EAM advised people to move on with the times, putting their trust in teamwork and “know what you don’t know”.
What Is The Book About?
At the launch event of his book, Shiv Khera, best known for his book You Can Win, described stress as a “silent killer” and said it has gone up by 400 per cent in the last two decades. “$1 trillion is lost evey year due to stress-related issues. At least 83 per cent people are facing stress at their workplaces. What is going on? Most books out there on stress are talking about breathing and meditation, but if your attitude is messed up, you can do all you want and nothing would work,” he said.
“Stress is normal, it is natural, it is unavoidable. Stress cannot be delegated. If you cannot handle your problems. If you have the tools to handle your problems, you can resolve your issues and that is all this book is all about. Live while you are alive. Don’t die before you are dead,” he added.
In his new book, the bestselling author goes into extensive detail about different aspects of stress management, attitude adjustment, emotional stability and work-life balance.
In an interaction with ANI Editor-In-Chief Smita Prakash, Khera spoke on issues pertaining to dealing with stress, appeasement, toxicity and distractions. “Problems are a sign of life. If you are running short of problems, it is time for you to pray… Let’s accept things graciously. Life is a challenge and we all have choices,” he added.
‘If We Ignore What’s Important…’: Khera On Work-Life Balance
Speaking to CNN-News18, Khera weighed in on the current debate on work-life balance and underscored the importance of priorities. “Work life balance is very important. All of us want it, need it and without it we have a problem. But show me anybody who has achieve it 100 per cent.”
“India has become a hub for startups. Anybody who have started a new company are putting in 14-16 hours per day. An average CEO in the US works 60 hours per week. Someone from your family falls sick and is lying in the hospital. Now you are in the hospital for 14 hours. Is that work-life balance? It is all about priorities,” he added. The author stressed that people don’t have time because they have messed up their priorities and what is important in their lives.
“We forget to distinguish what is important and what is urgent in our lives. Whenever we ignore what is important, it converts into something urgent. Health is important but it is not urgent, but if I ignore my health long enough, I will land up in the hospital. Relationships are important in our lives, but if we ignore them long enough, we start talking through our lawyers,” he further told News18.
